polyamory, Beyond Infidelity

Can love accept polyamory? Can you love without demanding or expecting fidelity? Is it possible to accept that love is not exclusive? Until now, the romantic and traditional version of love has been built around the paradigm of fidelity, exclusivity, and ownership of the loved one. The breaking of this assumption has plagued much romantic literature with crying, duels and suicides, even influencing norms that have used it as a justification for various behaviors.

In Polyamory, beyond fidelity, the Brazilian sexologist Flavia Dos Santos calls these concepts into question, arguing, among other reasons, the opposite: that love is freedom and that loving is granting it. Polyamory considers love as something infinite, which should not be limited to a single person or a single moment. Polyamory is not feeling jealous, not controlling, not castrating. Polyamory is living unconditional love without having to give up on others.

As a result of studies and research, as well as contact and exchange with people who consult her or attend her talks, Flavia Dos Santos decided to address in this book the topic that always comes up: the “ghost” of infidelity, fear to loss because of “another”, the difficult management of jealousy, the painful frustration of expectations. Are we prepared to take on an open practice of love? It is a question that this new book can undoubtedly help answer.